Just A Journal
by Switchblades and Sunsets
Summary: Two-Bit gets the craziest ideas, doesn't he? One year after Pony's book is published, Two-Bit convinces him to try writing in a journal. It was meant as a joke... What if it became more than that to Ponyboy?


**This is just a completely random idea I had of Pony's life after he got his book published. I'm going to try it in diary/journal format, and I'll just see how it goes. :)**

**I don't own The Outsiders.**

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JOURNAL

This was Two-Bit's idea.

Only he could come up with a suggestion this crazy. I feel so darn stupid writing in this thing! I mean, ever since I got that theme published, everybody's been bugging me to either to , as Darry calls it, "Reach my full potential as a writer" or, in Steve's words, "just keep writing boring junk that no one really cares about, but which apparently brings in loads of cash."

The day after I had handed in that theme for English, Mr. Syme had called our house to ask if I'd be willing to publish it. Darry had picked up the phone, and later he'd confessed that he thought it was a prank call.

Nobody had even bothered to read what I wrote before I handed it in. When I tried giving it to Darry to look over, he'd looked at me like I was insane. I gave that idea up quickly, and ended up handing the assignment in, mistakes and all.

Mr. Syme didn't seem to mind.

I'd had a real hard time deciding the name of what would be my first "published" book. I wanted something short, but meaningful. A title people wouldn't understand when they first picked the book up, but would slowly understand when they got into it. "The Outsiders" turned out to be that title.

To be honest, I didn't think what I wrote on a whim was worth being put into print. I still don't, even after a year's passed since the first copy was released. We've got all the money in the world now, since the story turned into an immediate success.

My English teacher had even pulled me aside a few months ago and said it could even become a classic like Gone With The Wind. I just couldn't believe even ONE person would want to read about the life of a greaser. The world's one weird place, that's for sure.

We haven't moved out of our old house. There are just too many memories here. Darry pulled me aside a few weeks after the book came out, and told me in this grave voice that he had decided to let _me_ make a very important decision. He said that since I was the one who had gotten us the money, I should be the one to decide if we should move or not. It was the easiest "big decision" I'd made in my whole life.

Sometimes I still wonder what Johnny or Dally would have said if they stuck around long enough to find out I actually wrote something and got it published. But I guess I'd never have written anything if that were the case.

I wish they were still alive.

I've been thinking a lot lately, about the real reason they died. It's all just about money, isn't it? If Socs didn't have so much more money than greasers, there would have never been the two groups. We wouldn't need to hate each other so much.

But now, I've got all the money I'll ever need, but I still wish everything could go back to the way it was. I'd happily take living on the streets, with barely any food, if that would get Johnny and Dally back. I would be so much happier than I am now.

So when it all comes down to it, Johnny and Dally died for nothing. Absolutely nothing at all...

What am I writing?!?!

If Two-Bit finds out about this... Would he have something to joke about for the rest of his life. At least I got all that out of my system. Something tells me I'll regret it for years if I don't burn this page right now. Who knew I could actually get something out of this journal?!

I guess... If I hide it well... I _could_ continue. Not as a _Dear Diary_ thing or anything... That makes me embarrassed just thinking about it. Maybe... But for now, I have to get rid of this page.

See ya.

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**So, how was it? It'll probably be a oneshot, maybe two if I get an idea. Please review! :)**


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